Mercy and Truth Meet Together: INFJ Christians

Our walks with God don’t all look the same. We’re influenced by our backgrounds, variations in beliefs, and individual personalities. And even though the goal is for us all to become “like God,” that doesn’t mean we become indistinguishable from each other. God created great variety in people and I believe He did that for a reason.

This is the first post in a series looking at Christians with different personality types. Today, we’re focusing on my personality type — INFJ. When you start talking with people of faith who fall into different personality type groups, you notice not all the personalities feel equally valued and understood by Christian churches. And churches on the whole seem skewed toward attracting Sensing and/or Feeling types. If Christianity is a faith meant for all people then why aren’t we doing a better job of connecting with all personality types?

Empathy For All

I asked INFJs which Bible characters they identified most with and received a flood of responses. It seems we can’t pick just one favorite character. Several INFJs mentioned that our empathy makes it easy to identify with Bible characters. Rachel writes, “My personality pushes me to strive to understand everyone, so I can identify with all the characters in the Bible in some way.” We do have favorites, though, (mine is the apostle John) and the INFJs who did get into details about their favorite characters were very specific.

I identify with David the most. His emotion portrayed through the Psalms and some OT stories resonate in my heart, especially that of love for God, the Scriptures, and pains of stress under sin and oppression. The way in which he responds to certain situations are very similar to how I’ve responded to mine relate as well. – Sarah H

I identify most with Rahab because she was an idolater who was saved when she trusted God. Not only that, but because of that decision, she was given a place in the line of Christ. I, too, was an idolater, but when I trusted Christ, God adopted me into His household. Now I’m a princess in the royal house of God. – Lillith

There wasn’t a whole lot of overlap, but multiple INFJs specifically mentioned King David, the Apostle Paul, and Jesus Christ. In our favorite characters, as in many other things, INFJs seek connection. They’re identifying with Bible characters who share aspects of their own personality traits and who inspire them to connect with God. And we do that with multiple characters. Take a look at some of what an INFJ named Alexandria wrote me:

I am Mary and Martha. I love Mary for the way she valued Yahweh and sat attentively, listening to all His wisdom. I identify with Martha and always love to think that I am treating my guests like royalty by having everything organized and prepared.

I love David…oh how I love him. I love that he was so gracious to Saul, even though Saul treated him so badly, trying to kill him! I love that David was a flagrant sinner and yet God called him a man after His own heart. I am so moved at how gracious the Lord was with David every time, and I remember that when I feel like my failings are stacking up!! I like his passion for life and the depth of his soul and all that he felt so poignantly. …

And last of all, my heart beats with Paul. I love his drive to get others to really live by the teachings of the scriptures. His quest for spiritual excellence is so awesome and it is so moving how dedicated he is to those he serves and he loves them so authentically and I feel like I really “get” him. He is a person who is passionate in living the Christian life the right way with integrity and love.

Mercy and Truth Meet Together: INFJ Christians |

Using Our Gifts

INFJs who talked about serving in their church felt their contributions were appreciated. These INFJs are leading Bible studies, cooking dinners for small groups, participating in youth/teen ministry, using their artistic skills, teaching, and contributing musically. Many INFJs also expressed the desire to help more, but said they either haven’t had the opportunity or were actively discouraged.

I would like to do more bible studies and discipleship. The main thoughts in my head now is hosting small studies at my home. – Tonianni

There are things I would love to do, but as yet have not had an opportunity … like teaching an adult Bible class. … writing is not supported, although, I learned the hard way that editing IS (I have created more newsletters than I care to count). – Rachel

I am a watch(man) on the wall, and people don’t listen because I cannot explain my process. God rescued me from witchcraft, so my church is afraid of my testimony. – Lillith

Bottom line? INFJs recognize that they have gifts and talents, but aren’t always quite sure what to do with them. E.F. wrote, “I probably have some ‘talents’ I’m not very happy about because I think I can’t use them for God.” Or the INFJ might know how to serve, but face pressure from others to serve differently. For example, JayLee observed that her in-home ministry as a homeschool mother is undervalued by those who prioritize “church” work.

Meeting Expectations

Even though INFJs are generally caring and people oriented, we have a limited amount of social energy. And that can cause problems in a religion that’s focused on fellowship with other believers and spreading the gospel to non-believers. Sarah H mentioned, “there is a general tension with the mentality that ministry is an extroverted endeavor.” She loves working in youth ministry and helping people, but has discovered she needs a no-people day once a week if she’s going bring her best self to those endeavors.

INFJs struggle to connect with fellow believers, especially if it’s just in the few minutes after church services (we need more one-on-one time to build friendships). We also struggle with leaving our comfort zones to engage with others, both in the church and outside. Some feel pressured to evangelize but, as JayLee pointed out, “evangelism is a *gift* and most people are not gifted with it!”

I think Rachel puts it well when she wrote that her biggest struggles as an INFJ in the church are “Fitting in. Finding my groove. Feeling accepted. Forgiving others. Sharing my faith my way.” It’s not that INFJs don’t want to meet the church’s expectations for ministry, fellowship, and spreading the faith. It’s that we need the freedom to do these things our ways using the gifts God has given us.Mercy and Truth Meet Together: INFJ Christians |

Discussing Our Faith

Several INFJs mentioned their need to debate the finer points of faith with fellow believers. Unfortunately, many have also encountered people who aren’t comfortable with that. Tonianni tries “not be very NT about” doctrine, but still comes “across sometimes as overly intellectual, argumentative and hard for people” to understand. She also says her biggest challenge is not having enough people to Bible study with.

My personal experience has been a bit closer to JayLee’s. She wrote, “I like to discuss in-depth, sometimes controversial topics and have been met with opposition because people often assume talking about anything ‘controversial’ is akin to fighting or criticizing; or they aren’t interested in seeing things from a different perspective and don’t want to challenge themselves intellectually.” We don’t mean to sound like we’re attacking your beliefs (this is our faith, too, remember), but we do want the freedom to ask “why?” questions and refine our viewpoints.

I think this problem arises (in part at least) because of an Intuition-Sensing disconnect. To grossly oversimplify the differences, Intuitives enjoy talking about “what if …?” and exploring patterns while Sensors prefer taking about observable, concrete reality. Intuitives make up only about 30% of the overall population and it seems that percentage is lower in the church. One certified MBTI practitioner I talked with agreed “that most churches are run by SJ types and are catered to those.”

As an INFJ I have rarely been in a church I felt “at home” in. I have a lot of questions and I struggle a lot in maintaining faith and belief. I have to work hard at it. When I ask questions I’m often met with the response, “God is sovereign so we can’t possibly know these answers, we just have to have faith.” The SJ and SP Christians I know seem to be able to accept that so easily, to accept God’s reality and authority. I struggle with it daily. I wish I could just accept it and believe, but I can’t force myself to no matter how much I try. I have grown wary of voicing my questions because I am often met with a feeling that the pastor or person in the church considers me a “bad” Christian because my faith doesn’t come as naturally. – Susan

Our introversion also means we need more time to process information. It plays into something Lillith mentioned: “I would say if anything causes issues, it’s got to be my slow processing and lack of skill in extemporaneous speech. I think sometimes people think I’m not too bright. It makes them wonder whether they can depend on me.” She also mentioned that she’s been seen as unpopular and arrogant because she refuses to compromise her beliefs. An INFJ might have endless compassion for someone, but we can’t just sit by and let them destroy themselves. We have to speak up for truth. And that makes it even harder to find people who want to discuss faith with us.

This is why I chose Psalm 85:10 for the title: “Mercy and truth meet together. Righteousness and peace have kissed each other” (WEB translation). INFJs prize both sides equally. We need to find balance between loving unconditionally and standing up for God’s truth. We need to hear about God’s mercy embedded in faithful preaching of His words.Mercy and Truth Meet Together: INFJ Christians |

Reaching INFJs

When I asked INFJs what sort of teaching styles connect with them best, the responses were very similar. I’d expected a little more variation between individuals, but apparently the mental processes we share gravitate toward the same preaching styles. INFJs enjoy listening to people who can faithfully explain God’s word and show how the teachings apply to real life. Several mentioned that they like teachers who explore the depth of individual Bible passages while placing them in context with other scriptures. We’re also attracted to preachers who can connect with their audience without becoming overly showy. We don’t want to feel like someone is yelling at us or trying to manipulate our emotions.

Individual INFJs differ from each other in whether or not they enjoy small group discussions. E.F. writes, “I like debating about something in a group of Christian after everyone studies something about it for a while” and Tonianni wishes “they had informal sessions after the service to talk about what was just preached.” Other INFJs want to stay invisible while they’re taught and be challenged to continue their studies alone.  Rachel writes, “Small discussion groups and sharing within them terrifies me and I end up saying things I regret, not because I didn’t mean them, but because of how I perceive they were received by others.”

To successfully reach INFJs, the church must be teaching truth in a way that resonates both emotionally and logically. INFJs have top-notch hypocrisy detectors and they’re unlikely to stay with a church that can’t back up what they say. Sarah G writes, “original practice and thought means everything to me. Any preaching or communication of Gods truth and gospel must be relaxed and natural and verifiable biblically and secularly and by faith.”

Also, INFJs are not the kind of personality you’ll reach with shouted hellfire and brimstone sermons. Sarah H points out that a church hoping to reach INFJs should always “talk about the mercy and grace of God.” I agree. If someone’s shouting at me, no matter how good the message, I tense up and can’t focus. Also, the first time I really felt a deep, personal connection with God and my faith was when I realized Jesus loved me enough that He died to make a relationship between us possible. Calls to repentance are essential, but the love and mercy of God is what first speaks to my heart.Mercy and Truth Meet Together: INFJ Christians |

Why Christianity?

I almost didn’t ask the question, “Why are you a Christian?” because I felt the obvious answer is “because God called me and I responded.” But I’m glad I did. While most INFJs have a similar answer to my own, there’s variations in the reasons INFJs give for responding to God’s call (and I’m also noticing non-INFJ types are giving different answers). Rather than trying to whittle the responses I got down to a few paragraphs, here are excerpts from all the INFJs who answered this question:

  • “I believe God has drawn me over the years to Godself. Grew up in a mixed religion home, then went Anglican, then Pentecostal, but I only learned about God’s grace 7yrs ago (I am 30+) … Every other story falls short of Christ laying down his life for us. Then there’s music! lol, being able to sing praises is one of the most beautiful gifts we’ve been given on this earth.” – Tonianni
  • “I have been a Christian since I was a child. I have confidence that Christianity is the true religion and I guess that falls in line with my type because I like to have knowledge and facts about subjects.” – Vickie
  • “I tend to take a Calvinistic approach to this and say I am a Christian because God chose me and I responded to his promptings. There is no other god that I am aware of that has the willingness to be patient in this process of sanctification, is willing to be inmate in this relationship, and was willing to be the one to initiate the relationship through the life, death, and resurrection of His Son, Jesus.” – Sarah H
  • “In true INFJ fashion I am a bit different. Not growing up in any particular church I was taught the word of God at home, and I feel that I have been able to explore my spirituality freely. Intuition and God being my guide. I began receiving the Good News magazine from the United Church of God as a new mother and have found myself in the last ten years or so on a journey to the Jewish roots of Christianity.” – Sarah G
  • “I kept coming back to Christianity. It made sense to me. It gave me grace. God gave me a free will and if I accepted Jesus as the Person who saved me from my darkness I could go to heaven. I don’t have to work toward perfection like all the other religions. I get to work out my salvation my own way. I can challenge a pastor’s attitudes or biblical angles (with respect, of course) because we are all equal under God. There is no maze to go through to get to heaven. I don’t have to earn it. I am free to live for Christ. I am free to make a million huge mistakes. I am free to follow Him and become more like Him and have a relationship with Him. I can endure ridicule and passive-aggressive persecution because I know who I am. God never makes fun of me. God loves me. No other way works.” – Rachel
  • “I’m a Christian because Jesus rescued me and gave me a new heart. I see the evidence everywhere of God—untamable; inestimable; holy, holy, holy (holiest of holy holies). How could I do anything but worship Him? I know Christianity is the right faith because I have seen the wrong religions and felt their emptiness and frustration. Christianity is the only faith that does not rely upon finite man, who clearly cannot get the job done.” – Lillith
  • “I grew up attending an evangelical church, but by middle school rejected what I was taught. My journey to belief was somewhat like the humbling of Nebuchadnezzar’s. Everything I valued most–my talents and relationships with friends and family–was taken away from me over the course of 3 years until I was in deep depression waiting to die. Then, one afternoon while I was sitting on my bed God quickened me. I can’t explain it, but immediately I loved God and knew He loved me and my desires started to be conformed to His. It really was the Holy Spirit, of course. As another commenter mentioned, I don’t believe I chose Christianity–in fact I nearly hated it and despised the external shows put on by many I saw in the Church. Having been dead, and then made alive–blind, but now seeing, I cannot help but believe Christianity is the true faith, and because of the way in which God drew me to Himself–where it was 100% His doing–I cannot doubt His Word which says that Jesus is the only way to the Father, meaning all other faiths must be false.” – JayLee
  • “I was raised in very anti-christian and anti-religious context but since my childhood I have been mad into history. The sureness of Christians ready even to die for their faith is everywhere in history. I was both scared and fascinated. So I studied a lot about Christianity and red the Gospel. I found so many proves (mainly historical) that this faith is right. And I also felt that the teaching of Jesus is exactly what I was looking for. But today the historical and other proves are not my main assurance. Today I simply believe in Christ because I know him.” – E.F. (an INFJ from the Czech Republic)

Mercy and Truth Meet Together: INFJ Christians |

Your turn! If you want to share your INFJ story or talk about INFJs in the churches, comment below. You can also check out the other posts in this series here:

If you’re a different personality type looking to contribute an upcoming blog post in this series contact me or head over to the original post. I’d love to feature you! Please note: unless you tell me otherwise, I’ll assume that by getting in touch you agree I can quote you directly and credit you by first name (or screen name) and Myers-Briggs type in future projects.

If you’d like to know more about the INFJ personality type, check out my book The INFJ Handbook. I just updated it with a ton of new information and resources. You can purchase it in ebook or paperback by clicking this link.




34 thoughts on “Mercy and Truth Meet Together: INFJ Christians

  • Hi Marissa, I relate to Noah and Daniel, as their lives resonate with me. Both N and D had to depend wholly on God, as they were relatively alone in God’s mission for them- but God did give each a small amount of friends and family to be with them on their journey. Both had to stand firm in their faith against people who were against them, thought they were different and did not believe.

    I am blessed to attend a church that teaches the whole council of God. We are taught chapter by chapter, verse by verse all the way through the bible. We start at Genesis and march on through to the book of Revelation. It takes around four plus years to get through doing two to four chapters a week. We also get application as an important part of our study.When I first became a Christian my attendance was at a church where the pastor did topical sermons. The way I now feel about it is that studying verse by verse lets me know what God thinks and sermons give me way too much of what man thinks.

    Extroverts abound in the church and I feel that they are moving so fast that they overlook the introverts, though there is a place for us when we pray about what God wants us to do.

    This blog is an answer to prayer, as I have been thinking about how being a Christian s nd an infj actually mesh together. Thank You.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’ve never heard of a church that teaches chapter-by-chapter in that way. How interesting! I try to spend part of my personal Bible study time reading through the Bible like that. I do think focusing only on study topics can lead us to miss aspects of God’s teachings and see only on bits and pieces if we aren’t careful. I’m always trying to remember to ask, “What’s the context?” when reading isolated verses. But I do also like topical sermons/studies to look at what God says about a given subject throughout scriptures. It just has to stay focused on studying what God says instead of, as you mentioned, what man thinks. Thanks so much for commenting!


  • This is beautiful! It’s nice to see a place where INFJS aren’t talking about new age and witch craft and things like that. I absolutely love David, and Moses. I like that God called him (moses) and he was looking for excuses lol. I just love his relationship with God. He spoke with God face to face!!! And David, his love for God is so beautiful, I can’t even describe it. I love Eve ( though a lot isnt said about her) and Mary
    I also find that I’m not afraid to question my beliefs and that scares people. I do enjoy logical and philosophiCal conversations about God. This has made my faith stronger.
    But what i love most about Christianity is that we have the Holy spirit in us. He’s my go-to when I have a burning question that people wouldn’t even consider. His answers are always mind blowing and beautiful ☺. And He challenges me to be everything I can be and more!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks for your comment! I know what you mean about the new age INFJs. There seems to be quite a push in some circles to see us as mystic spiritualists, but many INFJs are Christians and I like to think my fellow Christian INFJs can feel at home here on my blog discussing and debating our faith.

      Liked by 1 person

  • Thank you for your really interesting blog. I’m an INFJ and my favourite characters are both writers – James the brother of Jesus and John the evangelist. I’ve been studying both in depth recently. I like to learn about the bible and the roots of my faith from a historical as well as a theological perspective, which other people you quoted in your article also mentioned.
    The thing that tends to divide me from other Christians at times is my drive for social justice which makes me appear very liberal and sometimes overly strong in my approach. It is important for me to fight for those who are oppressed and voiceless, as I believe Jesus also did. I have been reflecting on cultural factors at play here. I’m from the UK where I perceive it’s more acceptable to be a liberal Christian than in some other countries.
    I have been a Christian all my life and it is rooted in my very high N, which also makes it virtually impossible to explain in words!

    Liked by 1 person

    • There are some social and environmental issues where I lean more liberal than most people in my midwestern USA Church group. It can make things a bit awkward sometimes, but I agree with you that it’s important to fight for voiceless people and care about them like Jesus did.
      Thanks so much for your comment 🙂


  • I know this was posted a while ago, but I had to write a little comment.
    I don’t think I’ve felt more understood than when I read this blog post! I can so relate to all the people that said they see a bit of themselves in every Bible character, but I also love Paul. How God called him to something so much greater than he could have ever imagined and going from persecuting Christians to bringing people to Christ is so admirable; God used him despite who he used to be because He saw him as who He called him to be- not who he was. Just like me. I’ve messed up, but God’s called me to something so much greater than myself, something so much greater than who I’ve been. I’ve always had this problem of thinking that NOBODY understands me! This belief came to a point where I believed that nobody would ever understand me, and I’d be alone in my own mind forever. Until one Sunday when I had the revelation that God knows me. He knows me better than I know myself. He’s known me since before the foundations of the world, and that was enough for me. This keeps bringing me back to Him and his presence and being like Mary- just wanting to sit at His feet and be with Him. I’ve had my doubts, but every time I start to question God, He reminds me of how much He loves me. Honestly, I think that’s why I’m a sold-out Christian- because I am so sure of His love, and I want every one to know of His love for them.

    Thank you for this post!! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much for your comment! I’m so glad this post blessed you 🙂 The continuing realization of the depth of God’s love and knowing is one of the things that most draws me to Him, too.

      (P.S. sorry for the late reply — my spam filter was holding your comment hostage and I only just found it this morning)


  • I am a guy. I miss that there are not godly men who have commented [here] about how their faith intertwines and transforms their personality (INFJ- extreme N and F; slight I) into a unique species of the likeness of Jesus (see the C.S. Lewis quotes below). I have too often heard NJ qualities characterized as female- “women need this but men need this” finding that I often identify (is this regard only) more with the feminine. No, no, no- but I do sometimes feel like an inner female granted a male exterior and interests (including women in the past and my wife now). I do fit in with Jesus; I often struggle feeling and intuiting that I fit in fully socially AS a MAN. Some of that is likely due to my lack of boldness but I also need examples (exemplars) to follow as a male Christian who is also INFJ (and many other characteristics). I agree to the comments about a passion to understand Biblically (contextually, with grace and truth=Reality, and the ~”transformational grammar”~ the morphology and deep structure/appeal/Soul calling to soul of the Bible, and especially of the New Testament). To that end every year since 1978 (or maybe 1979) I read the NT in Greek. “I want to know him, and the power of his resurrection, and the sharing of his suffering–being conformed with him to his death” (Philippians 3.10). How do I get that from my will, heart, and mind into my body and soul? From reality to Reality (or is that the realm and work of God alone? But doesn’t he graciously partner-what dignity he gives us!- with us?)? Guys? Gals? –CT

    Great excerpts from “The Problem of Pain,” chapter X “Heaven” by C.S. Lewis:

    Click to access ProblemofPain_CSL.pdf

    p. 95
    This signature on each soul may be a product of heredity and
    environment, but that only means that heredity and environment
    are among the instruments whereby God creates a soul. I am con-
    sidering not how, but why, He makes each soul unique. If He had
    no use for all these differences, I do not see why He should have
    created more souls than one. be sure that the ins and outs of your
    individuality are no mystery to Him; and one day they will no
    longer be a mystery to you. The mould in which a key is made
    would be a strange thing, if you had never seen a key: and the
    key itself a strange thing if you had never seen a lock. Your soul
    has a curious shape because it is a hollow made to fit a particular
    swelling in the infinite contours of the divine substance, or a key
    to unlock one of the doors in the house with many mansions. For
    it is not humanity in the abstract that is to be saved, but you, you,
    the individual reader, John Stubbs or Janet Smith. blessed and
    fortunate creature, your eyes shall behold Him and not another’s.
    All that you are, sins apart, is destined, if you will let God have
    His good way, to utter satisfaction. . . .

    pp. 96f
    The thing you long for summons you away from the self. even
    the desire for the thing lives only if you abandon it. this is the
    ultimate law — the seed dies to live, the bread must be cast upon
    the waters, he that loses his soul will save it. But the life of the
    seed, the finding of the bread, the recovery of the soul, are as
    real as the preliminary sacrifice. Hence it is truly said of heaven
    “in heaven there is no ownership. if any there took upon him to
    call anything his own, he would straightway be thrust out into
    hell and become an evil spirit” [62 Theologia Germanica, Li.] But it is
    also said “to him that overcometh I will give a white stone, and in the stone
    a new name written, which no man knoweth saving he that receiveth
    it”. [63 – Revelation 2: 17.] What can be more a man’s own than this
    new name which even in eternity remains a secret between God and him?
    And what shall we take this secrecy to mean? Surely, that each of the
    redeemed shall forever know and praise some one aspect of the
    divine beauty better than any other creature can. Why else were
    individuals created, but that God, loving all infinitely, should
    love each differently? And this difference, so far from impairing,
    floods with meaning the love of all blessed creatures for one an-
    other, the communion of the saints. If all experienced God in the
    same way and returned Him an identical worship, the song of the
    Church triumphant would have no symphony, it would be like
    an orchestra in which all the instruments played the same note.
    Aristotle has told us that a city is a unity of unlikes, [64 – Politics , ii, 2,4.]
    and St. Paul that a body is a unity of different members. [65 – 1Corinthians
    12: 12-30.] Heaven is a city, and a Body, because the blessed remain
    eternally different: a society, because each has something to tell all the others
    — fresh and ever fresh news of the “my God” whom each finds in Him whom
    all praise as “Our God”. For doubtless the continually successful,
    yet never completed, attempt by each soul to communicate its
    unique vision to all others (and that by means whereof earthly art
    and philosophy are but clumsy imitations) is also among the ends
    for which the individual was created.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you so much for commenting! I love hearing from INFJ men – you guys are so rare I get maybe 4-5 times as many comments from INFJ women as men (though I have heard from one other Christian INFJ guy who didn’t comment publicly and some people have just given me their initials so I’m not 100% sure).

      I think we really do need your perspectives in the church. I’ve talked with several FJ and NF type guys who’ve struggled, as you mentioned, with figuring out how they fit in as men while using the gifts and personality God gave them. They need mentors and examples of godly men who know how to have feelings and emotions and will follow God even when culture tries to tell them it’s not “manly.”

      I love C.S. Lewis! He’s got to be my favorite Christian writer. So many good books, and “Problem of Pain” is one I really like 🙂


  • As an infj female I love love love David, I love the psalms so much, there’s so much passion and love shown with such beautiful words. The true authenticity and passion that David displays gets my heart moving :’)

    I also grew up in a catholic home where we believed in God and Jesus but didn’t practice our faith. Something that encouraged me to become christian was seeing how my mom had changed so much. As a family we went through very tough times which pushed my mom to reach out to God.
    After seeing her be so full of joy through the spirit it made me consider pursuing God.
    After two years I went through bad depression due to isolation. Which made me seek God and I found him and felt his presence one night in my room, I felt so much peach and joy, ever since then I gave my life to him.

    Liked by 1 person

  • Thank you for the article about INFJs and the church. I am an INFJ saved by God’s grace about 5 years ago. I love God’s Word and want to understand more about who He is and what He likes and hates and who I am. I want to know and experience Him more. I want to know what God thinks of this situation in my life and what He promises. All this is by God’s grace because I obviously struggle with sin and I also struggle with depression and anxiety.
    I care deeply about accuracy so a hearty amen to comments on verse by verse expository preaching. I don’t want to be in a fog of uncertainty and i really dont like vagueness or feel good cliches that aren’t true or don’t tell the whole story. So as much as God grants me through His Spirit I want to know what His Word says.
    I also care that preaching and teaching be passionate and relatable.
    I am curious as to what kind of teachers and preachers other INFJ gravitate towards. The best I can tell I haven’t seen or met many NF preachers (maybe Francis Chan) and I gravitate towards NTs like John Piper and John Macarthur who perhaps are INTJS and I think my pastor is INTP. Love these guys.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I loved Francis Chan’s book “Crazy Love.” A few John Piper books have caught my eye but I haven’t read him yet. I think I do tend to gravitate toward Intuitive teachers/preachers.


  • I, as an INFJ, feel furious with churchianity concerning the myriad deceptions and requirements that block INFJs from their callings as “neviim” (I hold to Hebraic supremacy over every word, pronunciation, etc…i.e. if a word like “god” which is how the tribe of “Gad” actually sounds in Hebrew, Hebrew & YHVH’S Word have supremacy of judgment over any other languages’ use of that pronunciation. In this respect, Feliz Navidad is an example of Spanish using Hebrew and literally means “faithful PROPHECY”, as a Navi is Hebrew for “prophet”, & has been ASSIGNED wrongfully to Dec.25, vs Sukkhot, or around Thanksgiving time, since Puritans never observed or acknowledged XMAS, being a pagan celebration…aaaaand “god” refers to the TRIBE of Israel, since that was a ploy from the Vatican in 360 A.D. to keep the Name YHVH & YHVHSHUA/ Yahshua from the VisiGodths & OstroGodths & subject them to tithing by essentially saying “the Godth of Godths died for your sins…I’ll pray to Him if you pay me & you’ll see miracles”, while they suppressed the truth in unrighteousness & prayed in YHVHSHUA’S Name…eventually God became the way to spell the Almighty and Goth was how one spelled the tribes, which has been argued to be the tribe of Gad. Research from my Anglo Saxon Godthic bible revealed how we got “God”).
    I am aware that once the ARMY of INFJS as prophets like JeremYAH discern how the counterfeits are fleecing them (see Jay P. Green’s Interlinear Greek English N
    T. Book of Acts 20:7 where, as the Beast which seeks to change times and seasons, the Greek SHOWS the Sabbath, yet the sidebar translations BLATANTLY change the day to the FIRST DAY of the week, just as the Great Whore of Babylon causes YHVH’S servants to commit indiscretions in observing the WRONG DAY as Sabbath, despite at least three WORLD LANGUAGES preserving the name of the real sabbath in Sabado/ Sabato!!!), then I believe the Ezekiel 37 2nd half prophecy will start to steamroll, where Ephraim/ Christianity with its proselytizing with Jesus at least tells folks the Savior lives & the Yahudim /”Jews”, who observe the true Shabbat and refuse to eat pork or rape their siblings (…seriously, those commands are sandwiched next to each other!) but haven’t seen the 50 plus times Yahshua is mentioned BY NAME in the O.T. (starting with Genesis 49:18, demonstrating that the One Crucified for our sins ~approximately 2000 yrs ago is Messiah) & then latch on to the truth, INFJS will finally find the fulfillment of their purpose and have relief from their angst.
    Obviously, I subject this to the review of those I esteem to be of the Cadre of prophetic types, which office cannot have been done away with, since we still hold to “the testimony of YHVHSHUA is the spirit of prophecy”, no?


    • Hey David, good stuff right there. First, I empathize with the fury you feel regarding the trickery that the sheep have endured for millennia. I, too, have struggled with these feelings, and had to figure out how to hand the anger and frustration over to my Abba and seek wisdom to navigate what to do with it next. Some things that YHWH has reminded me of are 1) “we all like sheep have gone astray” – do not fail to remember that the sheep and the wolves are not the same. The sheep are desperately in search of a shepherd, and our Shepherd calls them with loving gentility. Mimic His Way; 2) “We do not war against the flesh, but against the powers…” – don’t become distracted by the true enemy. Fight with Spiritual weapons: Word, Good News, Peace of our Abba, etc. Protect the sheep and fight the enemy, but do not make the mistake to think the sheep ARE the enemy. 3) PRAY – as prophets, or those with eyes to see and ears to hear, we are called to a deep intercessory life. Pray for the flock to have ready soil to receive the wisdom that the Spirit desires to reveal to them. Go to battle in the spiritual realm to dispatch the Lord’s Army to fight against the ones who desire to distract, confuse, and prey upon the flock. But, most importantly, protect the flock. 4) You did not reveal these things to yourself, but it was a revelation of the Ruach HaKodesh. Do not think that you can condemn those who have not yet been granted the same gift. Pray for them instead. Hugs, brother. You are not alone, but our Abba is also not caught unawares. Stand firm, but patient in Him. He’s got this. “Speak the Truth in Love.” Shalom.


  • I thoroughly enjoyed this article and completely empathize with oh so much of it! I have struggled to fit in to basically every single denomination I have attended over the past 15 years, and now I realize that it is basically because I do not believe in sectarianism. Every denomination has a wall that it hits that to my Spirit says, “thou shalt grow thus far and no further,” so when I begin to ask questions that push against the walls of the denomination (“Why must women wear skirts? What about Sabbath on Saturday? Is this holiday even in the Bible? What about guns? Why is this ritual necessary? etc, etc, etc…”) I inevitably begin a process of moving out from the boundaries of the church and must move on. Only in the last few years have I come to terms with this element of my design and begun to embrace it, and now am finally in a place where I feel that our Abba is leading me to be used in a new way, which is both terrifying and exhilarating.

    As far as scriptural personalities I relate to, I have to say both Samuel and Paul are my spirit buddies. I feel a deep kinship with both of them and have since I first began to study the Word. I look forward to keeping in touch with this venue. Have a blessed day in Him. Shalom.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Julie! I’m glad you enjoyed the article. I had to smile reading your questions, since I keep the Sabbath on Saturday and try to observe the holydays found in the Bible rather than the ones that aren’t. And I like to ask questions, too 🙂 I’m so happy the Lord has brought you into a place where you feel you can be used. That’s such a good feeling!


  • In the Bible, I identify with those who seem left out or rejected. How must Thomas have felt to be the only one not to see his beloved Rabbi after the Resurrection? When the 11 cast lots for Judas’ replacement, what was it like for Justus to lose to Matthias? Or for Andrew not to be included at the same level as Peter, James, and John – Peter especially since they were brothers and Peter arguably had some significant character flaws? My heart hurts when I think about these little mini-rejections by God. I know in my mind that He loves us all, but it is still hard for me to think about this.

    You mention having the Church reject your gifts. This has happened to me various times. I remember volunteering to bring food for my church’s homeless ministry. They requested ice cream toppings for making sundaes. So I made several sauces and brought them in. Those running the ministry complained that I had made them myself. Apparently, my homemade offerings were inferior to a squeezy bottle of strawberry Nesquik. I also remember how desperate the pastor was for chaperones for a youth group overnight ski trip. I had some experience with the youth group and I readily volunteered, despite not being much of a skier. I figured I could drink hot chocolate and do some spiritual reading in the lodge, be the “on call” adult if someone broke their leg or something, and be available to the girls for some quiet time and spiritual conversation in the evening. About a week before the trip, the pastor asked me if I planned to ski and I said no. He then told me that they had all the volunteers they needed and I wasn’t invited to attend the trip. I really did want to tell him, “Not everyone is a sensing extrovert, and that’s ok!” I have gotten better about telling some of the more pushy/everyone-has-to-participate-exactly-the-way-I-say-or-it’s-obviously-not-fun extroverts exactly that since that experience.

    Finally, I also struggle with the whole, “Let’s be social and mingle over coffee and cookies all the time” model of fellowship/church. My work environment – a service job which I know is absolutely my vocation from God – takes a lot out of me, and I look at worship as my solace. God is where I gather the strength to make it through the coming week. I know that some see me as anti-social or a jerk, but I can’t summon the fortitude for banal chit chat when I am just looking to rest in the Lord. About two years ago, I attended an “Advent Quiet Day” at church, which was billed as a way to rest, reflect, and prepare for the Nativity. One of the women there insisted on talking and chatting! I actually had to leave the building and get coffee from a nearby university building in order to find quiet and solace (fortunately, I was able to return to the church for most of the rest of the day). This past summer, I attended a six-day silent retreat at a Catholic retreat center. I was a bit nervous about being among all Catholics (about 18 of the 25-ish retreatants were nuns, too). I was also worried about spending such a long time in silence – had I bitten off more than I could chew? Despite these misgivings, I took the plunge. Best. Decision. Ever. It was like I had discovered food for the first time, and had no idea I was starving to death. The silence, journaling, Bible reading, solitary and communal prayer, walking in nature, everything about it was exactly what I needed. I would absolutely recommend a silent retreat to other INFJs. Finally, are there any Friends/Quakers out there? I have never attended a Meeting, but the peacefulness, simplicity, and silence that they value is so appealing to me. I would love to hear these perspectives.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’ve heard from other introverts that silent retreats are absolutely wonderful, but I’ve been kind of nervous about the idea. You make it sound very appealing!


  • thank u so much for writing this n allowing a platform for infj christians to comment. i can so relate to the nuances mentioned in the article and by the infj christians commenting here. as infjs, we tend to be more isolated so having a common ground to feel understood is so important. how about creating a reddit group for christians who are intuitives?s

    Liked by 1 person

    • That’s a really good idea! I have a big writing project I’m working on this month, but after I get that wrapped up I’ll definitely look into getting an Intuitive Christians group going. Reddit would probably be the prefect place for that. Thanks so much 🙂


  • Hello! I was just wondering where I could find Christian INFJ friends… do you have any idea? Lol 🙂 also, thanks for writing this.. and I noticed your last comment is about making a group discussion for intuitive Christians.. I’d love that! I need more Christian friends in general and one of my favorite things is having friends who think intuitively like me.. so both would be perfect because without that foundation of already knowing Jesus who is most important to me.. it’s hard to be extremely close to others due to certain differences. So that would be awesome. Did you post any new blogs since this one? Thanks again, God bless you. Ah feels great to say that and also know you’re infj lol. Heh. Understanding me in many ways, very cool. Okay thanks again.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Holly, Thanks for your comment!

      If you’re on Facebook, there’s an INFJ Christians page that could help you meet more INFJ Christians. Here’s the link:

      I’m glad you’re interested in the Intuitive Christians group! Hopefully it won’t be too much longer before I can get that going.

      Thanks for your interest in my blog! I usually post new articles twice a week. You can see the newest posts here: and there should be a “follow” button in the sidebar so you can sign-up to receive emails about new posts.


  • My favorite moment in the Bible is after the resurrection, when Peter realizes it is Jesus on the shore, throws off his shirt and jumps into the water to swim to Jesus. It catches my heart how he just jumps in–oh, to be with Jesus!

    Do you have gifts or talents that you feel are not appreciated or that you don’t have an opportunity to use in the church? I more often have felt like I needed to clone myself so I can help in more ministries. Churches tend to always need volunteers! I do have a hard time finding people who I feel comfortable talking to about all the branches of theology and church history. Many Christians are easily offended or not interested in the intellectual side of things. I feel like others have no especial need to rectify science and theology philosophically.

    Do you have gifts or talents that are particularly encouraged and supported in the church? Singing and musical skills are encouraged, and teaching.

    Are there expectations from other Christians that you have a hard time meeting because of how your mind naturally works? Yeah, again, just to keep quiet about books I’ve read and scientific and theological questions, while things like child rearing tips and how to get along with your husband, and are discussed at length. Which are great, it’s just that an equal opportunity is not given to discuss the more abstract topics, which I think inform and motivate us with the why for all the choices and actions of daily life. Also the expectation to be a good homemaker, is tough, since as an INFJ my Se is pretty atrophied. Lots of Se crises at home, although with maturity those happen less often.

    Which teaching/preaching styles connect with you best? How do you like to hear and learn about God and His word? My pastor is an ENFJ and it’s amazing. He understands nuance and is deeply educated with a well thought-out and authentic theology. In other words he is intellectual, but mature, living out his faith. Authenticity, humor, the willingness to (kindly) offend with the truth, and having in-depth knowledge of the Scripture, theology, and what is happening in the world regarding culture, technology, and other things. He understands the element of mystery in who God is, and so while deeply knowledgeable about the Bible and theology, he is also humble. He does sometimes raise his voice, but it’s earnest. Compassion is always there.

    In what ways could the church better connect with someone like you when preaching the gospel? I don’t think anyone could do a better job than the pastor I have now. Really grateful to have found this church. The people at this church, of all ages, seem more down to earth and ready to reach out and connect with others who are different from them, so that’s very good.

    What’s one of the biggest challenges you face as a Christian? Sadly, Arrogance! And inferior Se getting in the way of being more productive as a writer or volunteer.

    Why are you a Christian? Well, it’s God’s calling me that made me saved and the process by which I am sanctified is often a further abandoning of myself to God, just jumping in by faith, dying to myself in a new way, and being met with Such Generous Grace affirms me in my steps through fire. The longer I live in it, the more it proves true. It is strange, difficult, renewing and peace-bringing, always worth it. For the brain side of things, I immerse myself in so much in the world of ideas, and the ideas that make sense tend to hold hands–you see the rings and connections, the sisterhood of ideas that are courageous and noble and true and loving, and I’m always pointed to Christ in my searching.

    Liked by 1 person

  • Hi! I became a Christian in 1992 at the age of 20 and discovered I was an INFJ a few years ago now. My ENFP daughter put me onto the 16personalities test and I thought, Yeah, I’ll give it a go…after reading the descriptions of that personality type (especially the career choices often adopted by INFJ’s! – lined up with my nutritionist practice very well!) I was moved and thought, wow, must be something to this. Now I believe that God made our inner most being as well as everything else: and we can see His glory in creation, including the order and design in our personality!
    I love the apostle John, probably more than any other character (aside from Jesus Himself!) because I have a similar ministry – as one elder brother at church put it, You see things that most people don’t see.
    I don’t say this to flatter myself – if I have any gift at all, it’s from God, not me. I am worthless without Him and all I have is His anyway.
    Thanks for your site – it’s hard being an INFJ (especially a male one – we are indeed, very rare!) but knowing God understands and that there are others battling along out there is encouraging – God bless you!

    Liked by 1 person

  • I’m overwhelmed reading the comments. This is the best blog I’ve ever read. I relate to everything everyone have said which is too rare for me, as an INFJ. I’m glad I found this site!

    I’ve been contemplating about myself as a Christian. I struggle to put my thoughts in words. It’s incredible how it seems this blogs wrote all the words I want to convey to.

    Liked by 1 person

  • Thank you so much for this article. I too cannot stand fakeness in the church and it seems to be everywhere. And there’s no reason. All questions have good answers, and we already know what sinners we are, so why pretend we aren’t. Heaven forbid you mention you attend therapy.

    I identified with this too, “ wishes “they had informal sessions after the service to talk about what was just preached.”

    YES PLEASE! We could all learn from that.

    “To successfully reach INFJs, the church must be teaching truth in a way that resonates both emotionally and logically. INFJs have top-notch hypocrisy detectors and they’re unlikely to stay with a church that can’t back up what they say. Sarah G writes, “original practice and thought means everything to me. Any preaching or communication of Gods truth and gospel must be relaxed and natural and verifiable biblically and secularly and by faith.”

    YES. Holy Spirit led, in truth with words of wisdom.

    I’d open my own church, but I am not certain I can as a woman.

    Also, I am a HSP as well as INFJ. I identify with Joseph. I was chosen, not according to my will, to do a thing for God. But when I share my awe about it, with the intention of getting help, I am looked down on by believers, family and church leaders. They think I’m anywhere from arrogant to crazy. But it’s not my will. My will is to disappear completely.

    It’s really isolating and destroys my hope. Causes internal struggles for me morally too when I have to constantly forgive those who are not sorry and who should be there for me.

    Let’s start an online INFJ church.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi Tina, I’m so happy you found this blog post and took the time to leave a comment! Figuring out life as an HSP and INFJ is a challenge, especially when we don’t get the support we need from those closest to us. I pray the Lord will increase your hope and bring helpful, supportive people into your life.

      I understand your questions about if you can or should open your own church as a woman. I wonder if, perhaps, you might be able to find or start a Bible Study group or a Christian book discussion group instead? It might be easier than starting a church group, yet still let you connect with like-minded people. Just a thought 😊 I’ve found the scripture writing and book club groups I’ve been a part of are very helpful for connecting with smaller groups of people on a deeper level.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.