How Do I Know If I’m an INFJ or an ENFJ?

One of the questions that often comes up after someone learns about Myers-Briggs® types is how to tell which of two similar types they are. Maybe you took a few different online tests and they gave you a couple different results. Or maybe you started reading about the types and discovered more than one that sounds a lot like you.

If you’re trying to decide whether you’re more of an INFJ or an ENFJ type, I hope this article will help. Just looking at the names of these personality types, we might think that the only difference between them is that one is more extroverted than the other. This is only party true. When we dive deeper into the cognitive functions that describe the mental processes each Myers-Briggs® type uses, it become easier to see the differences and similarities between these two types more clearly.

If you’re not familiar with cognitive functions, click here to read “The Simplest Guide to Myers-Briggs® Functions Ever.” INFJ and ENFJs both use the same cognitive functions. They just use them in a different order of preference, as shown in this graphic:How Do I Know If I'm an INFJ or an ENFJ? | LikeAnAnchor.com

The way these cognitive functions work together makes ENFJs and INFJs very different in certain ways and very similar in others. The two types can often find lots of common ground and make great friends. But there are also several key differences in how they learn information and approach the world that makes it possible for us to tell these two types apart. Read more

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Personality Type Myth-Busting: What’s The Rarest Personality Type?

As an INFJ, I often see people talking about how it’s the rarest personality type. According to every type distribution I’ve seen this statement is true. However, I’ve also seen quite a few INFJs treat this rarity as if there’s a huge gap between how rare we are compared to the other personality types. Some also treat this rarity as meaning that we INFJs are so rare no one else can relate to us and/or that it makes us extra special.

While INFJs are the rarest type overall, there are other types that are almost as rare. And when we break type distributions down by gender, INFJ is not the rarest type among women (though it is among men). You can see the Estimated Frequencies of the Types in the United States Population in this chart:

Personality Type Myth-Busting: What's The Rarest Personality Type? | LikeAnAnchor.com

Relative Rarity For Each Type

As you can see from the type distribution chart at the start of this post, most of the Intuitive types each make up less than 5% of the population. The estimates from Center of Application for Psychological Type cover a pretty broad range, though. The Myers-Briggs® Foundation offers more specific estimates in addition to the ranges. These percentages pin-point INFJ at 1.5%, ENTJ 1.8%, INTJ at 2.1%, and ENFJ at 2.5%. They’re all pretty rare. Read more

7 Fictional Characters That You’ll Relate To If You’re An INFJ

What fictional characters do you relate to as an INFJ?

Just as we can describe real people using the Myers-Briggs® typology system, we can also type well-written fictional characters. Some of fiction’s most iconic and intriguing characters are INFJs and today we’re going to talk about seven that I think real-life INFJs will find relatable.

One great thing about looking at character personality types is that it helps us better understand people who have different types than we do. Fictional INFJs can serve as examples for what real-life INFJs might be like, and also show how much variation can exist between individuals with the same type.

The things that makes INFJs such great fictional characters are some of the same things that make them such interesting people. Though the rarest personality type on the planet, INFJs are fairly common in fiction. They’re thoughtful, introspective characters with a unique way of looking at the world and a keen interest in other people.

Alyosha Karamazov

It’s fascinating to read the narrator of Fyodor Dostoevsky’s The Brothers Karamazov discuss the story’s hero Alexi Karamazov (more often called by his nickname Alyosha/Alesha). He spends most of the introduction apologizing for presenting readers with such an unusual hero. “He is by no means a great man,” the narrator explains, but he is doubtless “a strange man, even an odd one.” He was strange “from the cradle,” growing up a quiet child preoccupied by something inside him while at the same time loving people. I’m sure many INFJs can relate to that in their own childhoods — liking other people but being too preoccupied by their inner worlds to be considered sociable.

As the story progresses, we see Alyosha dreads conflict with a loathing that I think all INFJs (and the other FJ types as well) can relate to. We see him weeping when others are hurt, displaying the empathy that’s so much a part of real-life INFJs. We see him make social blunders in an effort to make everyone happy and at peace, all with an INFJ’s insistence on working toward harmony in all situations. Like so many INFJs, he’s sensitive, emotional, indecisive on certain things (though quite decisive in others), and isn’t afraid to appear weak so long as he’s being true to his beliefs. Read more

7 Fictional Characters That You’ll Relate To If You’re An ESTJ

What fictional characters do you relate to as an ESTJ?

Just as we can describe real people using the Myers-Briggs® typology system, we can also type well-written fictional characters. Some of fiction’s most iconic and intriguing characters are ESTJs and today we’re going to talk about seven that I think real-life ESTJs will find relatable.

One great thing about looking at character personality types is that it helps us better understand people who have different types than we do. Fictional ESTJs can serve as examples for what real-life ESTJs might be like, and also show how much variation can exist between individuals with the same type.

The things that makes ESTJs such great fictional characters are much the same things that makes them such interesting people in real life. They tend to be well organized, disciplined, and skilled at making tough decisions. This makes them excellent leaders, something we see in most of the ESTJ characters on this list.

Bryan Mills

I haven’t seen Taken, but Susan Storm lists Bryan Mills as the ESTJ in her post “The Greatest Movie Heroes of Every Myers-Briggs® Personality Type.” She says that he “He embodies the quick-thinking precise nature of the ESTJ. He knows how to take charge, create an effective plan, and can easily give instructions to other people over the phone on how to move forward.” Like so many TJ types, he’s able to put emotions aside and take decisive, logical action.

As for the other aspects of his character, Susan says, “Mills shows his Introverted Sensing (Si) in the way he systematically pays attention to everything around him.” Like other ESTJs, he’s a detail-oriented person and can easily recall important information. He also relies on skills acquired in his past to solve the problems of his present situations — something SJ types tend to do very well.

7 Fictional Characters That You'll Relate To If You're An ESTJ | LikeAnAnchor.com
Quote from Taken (2008). Image: Liam Neeson as Bryan Mills

Eve Baird

Eve Baird from The Librarians is a fairly stereotypical example of an ESTJ in fiction, embodying the ESTJ’s blunt demeanor, no-nonsense attitude, and ability to keep things moving forward. ESTJs like Eve are grounded in reality and care about keeping the world running as it should be, a trait Eve devotes to keeping the Library safe and magical artifacts out of the wrong hands. Though she can seem gruff, she’s very loyal and cares deeply about people (a TJ trait that’s often overlooked).

Like other ESTJs, Eve’s preferred mental process of Extroverted Thinking involves measuring and managing impersonal criteria when making decisions. There are examples of this in literally every episode. Her co-pilot process is Introverted Sensing, which filters everything she learns learn through the lens of her own memories and experiences. That’s not to say ESTJs are inflexible. Once given enough information to work with, they’re quick to adapt their actions to match the situation. Anything else would be inefficient. This is partly due to the fact that they prioritize effectiveness, and partly due to their tertiary Extroverted Intuition.

7 Fictional Characters That You'll Relate To If You're An ESTJ | LikeAnAnchor.com
Quote from The Librarians Season 2, episode 9 (2015). Image: Rebecca Romijn as Eve Baird and Noah Wyle as Flynn Carsen

Leia Organa

Leia Organa of the Star Wars saga has a much different personality type than your typical princess figure in fiction. Most are Feeling types, but Leia’s response to Darth Vader, her criticism of her seemingly inept rescuers in A New Hope, and the way she instantly takes charge of every situation are characteristic of dominant Te types. She’s a take-charge sort of person who is fiercely loyal to family and values, and expects the same level of commitment from others.

Like other Sensing types, Leia’s focus is on the here and now. Even through she and the Rebellion (and later the Resistance) are fighting to change the future of the galaxy, she does that by shaping the present in a practical way. Her strengths as an ESTJ type make her a fantastic leader both in the Rebellion against the Empire and, later, in a variety of political and leadership roles. She also makes good use of her tertiary Extroverted Intuition (especially later in life) to help her see multiple solutions to problems and adapt quickly to changing situations.

7 Fictional Characters That You'll Relate To If You're An ESTJ | LikeAnAnchor.com
Quote from of The Last Jedi (2017). Image: Carrie Fisher as Leia Organa

Nick Fury

Nick Fury from the MCU might be more of an ENTJ than an ESTJ, but I include him on this list because I think ESTJs will find the way he uses the TJ side of his personality relatable and (depending on how you read his character) there’s also an argument to be made that he is an ESTJ type. Either way, Fury leads with a strong Extroverted Thinking function and (like many real-life ESTJs) he’s good at crashing through red tape to get the job done. He has zero patience for people who make stupid decisions, and he has cultivated the power needed to go around them.

Fury is motivated to make the world a safer place, even if he has to do that in ways that make other people like ISFJ Captain America uncomfortable. He’s concerned with the big picture and future security (more typical of ENTJs, but could be an ESTJ’s tertiary Extroverted Intuition). He is also highly pragmatic and makes decisions based on what he has learned in the past (more typical of ESTJs).

7 Fictional Characters That You'll Relate To If You're An ESTJ | LikeAnAnchor.com
Quote from of The Avengers (2012). Image: Samuel L. Jackson as Nick Fury

Olivier Armstrong

If you haven’t yet watched Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood I highly recommend it. It’s full of amazing characters, including ESTJ Olivier Armstrong. She is an extremely talented leader who commands absolute loyalty from her troops. While people might see her (and, in many cases, real-life ESTJs) as harsh and critical, those who get to know her find her scrupulously honest and see she doesn’t expect anything less of herself than she demands from others.

Major General Armstrong is the sort of character who self-confident, aggressive, go-getting ESTJs will find highly relatable. She doesn’t let other people, circumstances, or even herself stand in the way of what she wants to accomplish. She lives in a world of concrete facts and is devoted to a strong, efficient moral code much like many real-life SJ types.

7 Fictional Characters That You'll Relate To If You're An ESTJ | LikeAnAnchor.com
Quote and image from Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood).

Peter Pevensie

Peter Pevensie has been my favorite character from The Chronicles of Narnia since seeing the 2005 movie for The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe (I didn’t read the books until later). In our modern world, ESTJs have a reputation for being the hard-hitting, no-nonsense types that steamroll anyone in their way. Peter’s an example of the more gentle, guardian-like role that characterizes certain ESTJ types.

Like many ESTJs, Peter likes to be in charge but he doesn’t abuse his power. He uses it for others’ good, and is reliable, practical, and logical in all his roles from eldest sibling to high king. He takes his responsibilities very seriously, even making them part of his identity, and has a hard time adjusting to the real world once he has to leave Narnia. Like many real-life SJ types, he doesn’t like change and it takes him a while to figure out how to navigate new situations if he doesn’t have an existing framework for interpreting reality.

7 Fictional Characters That You'll Relate To If You're An ESTJ | LikeAnAnchor.com
Quote from The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe by C.S. Lewis (1950). Image: William Moseley as Peter Pevensie

Tiana

Like many real-life ESTJs, Tiana from Disney’s The Princess and the Frog is never shy about sharing her thoughts or making decisive decisions. She’s assertive and expressive in the face of friends, creditors, and villains alike. With her strong work ethic, family-focus, and adherence to doing what’s right, Tiana is strong example of the SJ Guardian type. She also has another trait I’ve noticed in SJs — they are, as Naveen observes, “secretly funny.”

Even better, Tiana isn’t an SJ stereotype. Many people assume types using Introverted Sensing as one of their functions are unimaginative, solidly traditional, and somewhat boring. That’s far from being true. Like other Sensing types, SJs are concerned with taking in information about the world around them, but they’re also interpreting that information in a highly subjective way. And so you get Tiana, building up a dream of the future that doesn’t look practical to outside observers, but makes perfect sense within her framework of reality. Her dream is solid, detailed, planned, and responsible.

7 Fictional Characters That You'll Relate To If You're An ESTJ | LikeAnAnchor.com
Quote and image from The Princess and the Frog (2009)

7 Fictional Characters That You'll Relate To If You're An ESTJ | LikeAnAnchor.comWhat did you think of this list? If you’re an ESTJ, which fictional characters do you relate to best? Is there anyone you’d add to or take off of this list? I’d love to hear your thoughts!

10 Ideas for Introvert Friendly Socialization

Introverts need people. This isn’t something you’ll hear about very often, though. Most of the time, you’ll either hear people who are critical of introverts complaining about how unsociable we are or you’ll hear introverts talking about how much we dislike being around other people.

Humans are social creatures, however. We have different preferences for how much and in what ways we socialize, but we all need other people. Being an introvert doesn’t mean you hate people. It just means that you’re born with a trait that makes you prefer the internal world. It means you re-charge better in quiet, low-stimulation environments, not that you do well in social isolation.

It’s no exaggeration to say that isolation can be deadly. Living in loneliness has a serious impact on our health. In fact, “The increased mortality risk is comparable to that from smoking. And loneliness is about twice as dangerous as obesity. Social isolation impairs immune function and boosts inflammation, which can lead to arthritis, type II diabetes, and heart disease” (“Loneliness Is Deadly” by Jessica Olien). And that’s just the physical health risks. Loneliness also damages our mental and emotional health, often leading to issues like increased stress, depression, and alcoholism (“The Dangers of Loneliness by Hara Estroff Marano).

So what’s an introvert to do? If you don’t like typical social events or groups, how do you avoid the mental and physical health risks of loneliness while also honoring your introverted nature?

This list includes tips for introvert-friendly ways to socialize with other people. Some of these assume you’re trying to meet new people, while others are great for doing with people you already know.

10 Ideas for Introvert Friendly Socialization | LikeAnAnchor.com
Photo credit: Dimitris Vetsikas via Pixabay

1) Attend An Interesting Event

It’s not all that difficult to find out about events going on in your local area. Check city websites, Google “local events,” or browse through events on Facebook. There’s bound to be something in the area that interests you and there are often options for small gatherings (like a morning yoga meet-up) as well as larger ones. If you’re at an event that interests you, you have a good chance of meeting people with similar interests and perhaps even finding a local group to join. Read more

How Do INFJs, ISFJs, ENFJs, and ESFJs Read People So Well?

Every personality type has unique, powerful gifts. For the FJ types, one of those gifts involves an ability to read people well. Exactly how this skill shows up varies from person to person.

  • You might meet an INFJ who picks up on so much about you that it seems like they’re reading your mind.
  • Or perhaps you know an ESFJ so in-tune with how people work in groups that every event they plan is an unqualified success.
  • You might find yourself in a group lead by an ENFJ who manages to make every single person there feel included.
  • Maybe you meet an ISFJ who knows exactly how to act in dozens of different social situations and always makes the people they interact with feel valued.

The FJ types all use a mental process called Extroverted Feeling, or “Harmony” (to use Personality Hacker’s nickname). ENFJs and ESFJs use it as their favorite (or primary) mental function. INFJs and ISFJs use it as their co-pilot (or auxiliary) function. Today, we’re going to take a closer look at how this cognitive function helps INFJs, ISFJs, ENFJs, and ESFJs read other people. Read more