Tag: grad school

5 Self-Care Tips for Grad School

5 Self-Care Tips for Grad School

Marissa

I’m getting close to the end of my second semester of grad school. It’s been a great opportunity to learn, to meet new people, to build skills, and to have fun. It’s also stressful. Course loads are different than in undergrad (which was almost 10 years ago for me). On top of that, you’re also teaching (or in my case tutoring), plus working other jobs, and right now you’re navigating all the Covid-19 stuff as well. Plus, there’s often other “life happens” sorts of things going on. By the end of the semester, people look half-zombie.

Everyone deals with stress, regardless of whether or not they’re in grad school, and self-care is something we all need to make time for. That “making time for” part can be particularly tricky, though, when you’re juggling multiple jobs, classes, research projects, and eventually a thesis. With that in mind, here are some of the self-care things that I’ve been doing during my first year of grad school. I hope others will find these tips helpful as well. Share any other tips you have in the comments!

1) Go for walks

This is one of the more time-consuming things on the list, but it’s also one of the ones that’s most helpful. A few times a week, I go walking for about half an hour. Not only does exercise help keep you physically healthy, it also gives you a short break from all the sitting and reading that’s so much a part of grad school. This ticks several boxes on the self-care list: exercise, giving your eyes a rest from studying, and giving your brain a chance to process everything you’ve been learning. You’ll likely find yourself more relaxed and better able to focus after taking a short walk.

2) Keep to some kind of a routine

Routines are a difficult thing to come by when your schedule is changing every semester and may even be different from one day to the next. Keeping something consistent can be a big help in making you feel like you have some control and stability in your life, which can help lower the anxiety that’s often such a big part of grad school. I’ve done this with my morning routine of prayer/Bible study, yoga, shower, and breakfast. You might find that a morning routine works for you, too, or maybe that it’s better to have a bedtime routine, or something that you do over a lunch break to help you re-center and focus.

3) Schedule a weekly reset

Resting one day out of the week has a long history in Christianity. Much of the world (even within churches) has moved away from a Sabbath, but there is still great value in taking God up on His offer of rest. Non-Christians can benefit from this principle as well by scheduling time every week for some more extensive self-care. Schedule something with a friend, do a mini retreat in your home, shut off your phone or email for a day. For me, I eat a nice meal Friday night (since Shabbat goes from sunset Friday to sunset Saturday), take a relaxing bath, play a low-stress game or read, then spend Saturday fellowshipping with other believers. After a long week of work, study, and life it’s so nice to be able to spend one day at the end of the week relaxing and resetting before starting it all over again next week.

4) Eat and sleep

Food and sleep are basic human needs, yet for some reason they seem the easiest to forget or push to the side when you’re in school. Dinner? That’s a snack between work and class, then maybe I’ll eat something at 9:00 tonight when I get home. Sleep? is that the thing where you fall into bed after writing like a maniac and hope you pass-out until your alarm goes off? I see the undergrads I work with skipping this self-care, I see my classmates doing it, and I catch myself doing it as well. I’m not as consistent about practicing this self-care tip as I should be, but most of the time I manage to make myself eat 3 meals a day and get 7 hours of sleep (which is what I’ve figured out I need in order to stay healthy and awake). Some of the best things you can do to take care of yourself are to eat as healthy as you can, don’t skip meals, and figure out how much sleep you need then make sure you get it as consistently as possible.

5) Say “no” when you need to

It’s good to say “yes” to a lot of the opportunities that come your way in grad school. But it’s also helpful to know when you need to say “no” and give yourself permission to do that. You’re human, and you can’t be on every committee, go to every conference, or re-adjust your schedule to convenience everyone in your life. If you’re not sure you have time for something, it’s okay to tell someone you need to check your schedule and get back with them, and then say “yes” or “no” depending on what you can realistically fit into your life. It won’t do you any good to take on more projects than you can complete successfully, or to say “yes” to something that’s going to rob so much time from something essential (like eating and sleeping) that you end up getting sick.

Takeaways

5 Self-Care Tips for Grad School | LikeAnAnchor.com
Image by Karolina Grabowska from Pixabay

Grad school is fun and crazy, and I’m still figuring it out, but I am getting better at making sure I practice the self-care I need in order to stay physically healthy and mentally alert. When I take care of my own needs, then I can be more fully present for the things that I want and need to do, and for the people I want to work with.

Are you thinking about going to grad school? Currently in grad school? Survived grad school and moved on to something new? I’d love to hear your thoughts! Everyone (whether you’ve been to university or not) share your favorite self-care tips in the comments!

Featured image by Tiny Tribes from Pixabay

Getting Comfy With Your INFJ Personality Type

Getting Comfy With Your INFJ Personality Type

Marissa

It’s been quite some time since I published a post about personality types. Since starting grad school last August, the time I have to spend writing on my more personal projects has been limited. I still Bible study every morning, which turns into the posts I share each Saturday, but I haven’t been researching and writing about personality types nearly as much.

Don’t get me wrong–I still find personality type fascinating and knowing I’m an INFJ is a key part of how I understand myself. I just haven’t had time to read typology books or blogs, or think all that much about topics related to Myers-Briggs® that I want to write about. My writing time is focused on things like “A Rhetorical Analysis of the Literature Surrounding Role-Playing Games, Race, and Identity” and a scholarly book review of John R. Gallager’s Update Culture. I might share links to those somewhere on this blog if/when they’re published, but they don’t really fit with the theme “finding our true selves in the people God created us to be” or with my interest in personality types.

One type-related topic I have been thinking about, though, is that I feel like I’m “settling in” to my type. Which I think is a good thing, but it also makes me feel a bit less motivated to constantly research and write about INFJs. Over the past several years, either in comments on this blog or emails through my contact form, I’ve occasionally heard from INFJs who talk about having (mostly) moved past the awkwardness of being INFJ. They talk about being happy, feeling balanced, and seeing their type as a strength or a neutral thing rather than a weakness or something that makes them particularly unique.

Getting Comfy With Your INFJ Personality Type | LikeAnAnchor.com
Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay

In the online INFJ community, we often talk about things like how different we feel from other people, how tempted we are to door slam those who irritate or hurt us, and how we’re a target for unhealthy people like narcissists. It’s easy to think of being INFJ as a burden, or a thing that sets us apart, or something people will never understand. I’ve been there, clinging to my INFJ label like a life preserver that makes the weirdness of your life make sense. And I think there’s a place for that, especially when you first learn about your personality type. The feeling of relief that you’re not alone or broken is one that many INFJ (most that I’ve talked with, in fact) mention when they talk about first discovering their personality type. Normalizing experiences like feeling alien, struggling to communicate, and seeing the world differently helps us realize that 1) there’s nothing inherently “wrong” with our personality and 2) other people really can understand us and they can help us figure out how to be in the world as INFJs.

That initial realization that we’re INFJ and embracing that identify is often the strongest way we relate to our personality type. But the way we relate to our type can change, and I think it probably should as part of personal growth. Based on conversations I’ve had with older INFJs, I suspect that if we were to chart the stages of a typical INFJ’s journey, it might look like this:

  • Recognizing that there’s something different about you
  • Learning about personality types and realizing that INFJ fits you really well
  • Seeking to learn about your type and learn from other INFJs
  • Accepting your personality quirks and figuring out how to manage your strengths and weaknesses
  • Settling into life as an increasingly mature, balanced example of an INFJ

Of course, this is an overgeneralization and it doesn’t account very well for the many people who aren’t sure if they’re an INFJ or another type like an INFP or INTJ. It does reflect what I’ve heard from many INFJs, though, and I think it will resonate with a lot of my readers. I’d love to hear what you think of this idea in the comments!

Right now, I think I’m somewhere in those last two bullet points. I’ve firmly embraced my weirdness, even more so than when I wrote a post about that topic two years ago. I finally went back to school. I’m managing the anxiety and depression I’ve struggled with for more than half my life in a much healthier way. I’m leaning in to the interpersonal strengths of my INFJ type and finally developing my Extroverted Feeling side so I can teach and tutor students. And it feels pretty good.

Wherever you are on your INFJ journey, I hope you’re doing well. I hope you’ve been able to connect with other INFJs (whether in person, on blogs like this one, or using social media), to learn helpful information about your personality type, and to grow toward living a fuller, happier life. And I hope we’ll all keep learning, keep being brave, and keep growing.

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If you’d like to know more about personal growth tips for the INFJ personality type, check out my book The INFJ Handbook. I’ve updated this second edition with a ton of new information and resources. You can purchase it in ebook, paperback, or hardcover by clicking this link.

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Featured image by StockSnap from Pixabay

Writing (Like Life) Is an Individual Growth Process

Writing (Like Life) Is an Individual Growth Process

Marissa

I started graduate school last week! It’s a Master’s program of Rhetoric and Writing, and it means I suddenly have less time for blogging than I did before. But it also means I’ve been reading a number of books and scholarly articles that are prompting me to think more deeply on topics related to teaching and the writing process.

That might not sound, at first glance, like something that has to do with “finding our true selves in the people God created us to be.” However, I’m struck by similarities between best practices for teaching students to improve as writers and what I know about personal growth. We don’t all follow the exact same patterns for personal growth, nor do we all grow at the same pace and in the same way. Similarly, one-size-fits-all is not a great approach to teaching writing. There are, of course, certain things we look for in “good writing” — a strong thesis, structure that supports the thesis, integration of quotes and examples, etc. But to a certain extent, whether or not something is “good writing” also depends on the individual writer. Read more →